Just Do What You Can Do
On making a difference during chaotic times and a list of links to keep you from doomscrolling
Welcome! I’m Dr. Jillian, a physician leader, mom, and coach who is on a mission to help other high achieving professionals and recovering perfectionists live less stressed, more satisfying lives. If the full post doesn’t show up in your e-mail, come over to the webpage or Substack App to see the whole thing. Subscribe here to get future posts straight to your inbox:
Recently, I co-facilitated a listening session at work to allow people to voice their thoughts and emotions related to the current state of the world.
Toward the end of the session, one of the participants mentioned that they wished they knew what to do in order to “make more of an impact.” Several people offered their thoughts and tangible ways that the person could get involved in community activities. The person expressed their gratitude, and the session carried on.
During this part of the session, I found myself feeling grateful for the exchange but also wondering what the person meant by more of an impact. Because, honestly, what does that even mean? Who decides what impact is enough?
If I had to guess, many of us feel like whatever we are doing will never be enough to combat the ever-growing (read: infinite) list of issues to address. As a physician who takes care of the sickest of the sick children, I know that I’ll never make more than a tiny dent in the mountain of systemic issues that lead to the illnesses and injuries of many of the children I care for. And, with the flurry of changes occurring now, I fear that the impact I have will be even smaller. I hate the truth of this. But I also know that continuing to work to make a dent inside and outside of the hospital is all that I, as one individual, can do.
I could get discouraged by this, but, instead, I choose to remember that there are so many other people doing what they can each day in order to make a difference for other people in large or small ways. I continue to be shown examples of this every day by the wonderful people around me at work and in my community. I see it here on Substack from so many people writing in the spirit of helping others. And, during a time when you may be starting to believe that the world is all bad, all you have to do is look around you to see that that is not true. There are helpers all around working to keep the going by doing small things wherever they can.
And I’m trying to do the same thing.
The world needs us to help each other, and we all need help in order to keep going. So, while I do invest my time and money on causes that have a broader impact on the world, I’ve also committed to doing the smaller things on a day-to-day basis that help lift up the people around me whether they are my friends or strangers.
For example, recently, I was taking a short walk during my lunch break, and I saw someone who was quite lost in our large hospital system. She looked like she was about to cry and told me that she had driven across the state in a snowstorm. Now, she was extremely lost and running late to meet someone. I ended up walking her quite a long way through the tunnels and back hallways to get her where she needed to go. I think she apologized at least ten times during the 5 minutes we spent walking. Once we reached where she needed to be, I could see the relief on her face, and she thanked me profusely. I said not to worry about it, smiled, and headed back to work.
I think my parents instilled this idea in me at a young age: if you can do something for someone, do it, especially if you have the time, money, and/or energy.
And it’s not just me who does these things. I bet you already do them too. But for some reason, a lot of people feel like the small things don’t count because they aren’t “big enough.”
Let me assure you that the small things are actually the big things.
Just do what you can.
In the spirit of helping you navigate the world right now, here are some links that have helped me recently:
Trying to Focus When I Want to Doom Scroll by
A way to calm down (that’s hiding in your pocket) by
featuring Ethan KrossPart one of my sanity plan - by
The increasing need for comfort food - The Contrarian
Wrap your hands around this by
- on the Life Examined podcast
Life, in Between Hope and Despair by
What if things don't get better? by
I Will Stay IF You Will Stay by
I’d love to hear what you’re doing to make a difference (large or small) during this time.
What I love about your writing is that you’re so honest and open. You write in real-time, reflecting on what so many of us are experiencing. I feel so seen in your writing. And, you take it further. You offer us perspective that so many of us need, but sometimes can’t quite create that distance needed.
In that light, I love what you’re saying about how we add value and what’s enough? To your point, it’s the little moments of grace, compassion, time, thoughtfulness that can go such a long way. Thank you for that reminder.
And thank you for including my round up in your post! 🫶🏻
Jillian, I appreciate what you wrote. The way you break impact down into the everyday, into what is possible, is something I live by too.
Walking that lost visitor through the hospital was an act of presence, of showing up for another person in a moment of stress. You did it because you could, not because it was grand or because it would change the world, but because it was what was in front of you. That is what matters.
I read your words and see a way of being that I recognize. Doing what is possible, where I am, with what I have. No grand gestures, no impossible expectations. Just action, real and grounded. I value that.